 for the life of The OTUNBA, my father-in-law, and my father. I chose to address him..){kind=link}
We give all glory to Almighty Allah (SWT) for the life of The OTUNBA, my father-in-law, and my father. I chose to address him by these three titles because, over the years, our relationship transformed from when, in the early 80s, as a young man growing up, he was the one many of my peers and I aspired to be like in the corporate world.
His accomplishments in the corporate world, his business acumen, his wisdom, his sophistication, his hard work and strength were values that we admired from afar. Yes, many people bear the traditional title of Otunba, but he was The OTUNBA. He was miles above others.
At that period, I never knew I would become his son by marriage. It was an admiration from a distance. Then I married Toyin and became his son-in-law. Personally, he was more than a father-in-law. He was a source of knowledge. I learnt from the best what it takes to stay at the top and how to stay consistent with one’s goals and aspirations.
He shared all the knowledge, experience, and insight with me. For that invaluable tutelage, I will always be grateful. His unwavering commitment to his family, particularly to Erelu, was unique.
At the early stage of my marriage to Toyin, I usually felt it would be difficult to get along with him. I would visit the family house and wonder why he had no equivalent of ‘Awon Boys’, his Ade Laoye, Koye Shogbola, and co around him. I mean, he had no ‘group of his own guys’ with whom he would gather at home, gist and socialise. His own ‘Awon Boys’ one would regularly meet with at home is ERELU Ojuolape, his wife of 66 years.
Unlike me, who will always have his friends, political associates, aides, and supporters around to discuss and exchange ideas with.
As a result of this significant difference, I felt that maybe he would not warm up to me. However, over the years, we achieved the opposite. We both bonded. I experienced his undisputed love. I usually watched with delight as he glowed, beamed with a deep smile, and exuded pride and satisfaction whenever I came into his presence.
We would spend hours together talking about the country. Though he was not a politician, he was very passionate about the country. As a result of my involvement in politics, he became a closet politician. Otunba was so familiar with all political issues and developments that whenever we discussed, I would always be miffed about the accuracy of his information.
At one point, I found out that there was no published article in the newspapers or online about me, whether positive or negative, that he had not read. Sometimes, he served as my barometer for how my media team was performing. When I joked that “Otunba, with all this information at your disposal and how current you are about political developments, you cannot say you are not a politician”, he would laugh and respond, “That is what you have turned me into”.
Over the years, he trusted my judgement and showed it. His last words and conversation with me in the hospital were instructive. He said, “Buki, come and take me home”. For me, that spoke volumes. It once again demonstrated that he relied on and trusted me as a son.
Otunba was a model to every young man who wanted to remain at the top echelon for a long time. He was a man who had been at the pinnacle of the socio-economic and cultural ladder of Nigerian society since the 1960s. He remained there till he was recalled by his maker last week. In a society like ours, this is a rare feat. It is challenging to stay successful and relevant for long because of several factors. These include the shifty nature of the political system and the prevalent ‘pull him down’ syndrome. Yet, Otunba was a perfect model of how to achieve enduring staying power.
In his death, the Nigerian private sector has lost a godfather, the social circle has lost a patron, the Lagos royal family has lost a dignified Prince, and the Lagos community has lost a leader. Still, we, the family, have lost a towering fountain of strength, an icon, a moral compass, and an institutional reference point.
Adieu, my second dad. May Almighty Allah (SWT) extend His infinite mercy to you in the grave and admit you into Aljannah Firdaus. Your Son and friend.
By Abubakar Bukola Saraki